Being A Stay-At-Home Wife

It would seem that a stay-at-home wife has tons of time on her hands. Wouldn't it?

Wouldn't you also assume that her house would be 100% perfect all the time because she actually has the time to clean it and organize every square inch of it?

And wouldn't it be safe to say that she is the most perfect wife in the sense that she is never overwhelmed and always has plenty of time to fulfill all of her husbands desires and wishes--meaning that the laundry is always done by the time he gets home, there is always a hot meal on the table, and she is ready to spend an evening waiting on him hand and foot.

Yea...

Not.

True.

I am a stay-at-home wife and I do have tons of extra time on my hands...but the pressure that is associated with this role is overwhelming and often leaves me paralyzed. I am so overwhelmed by all that I could and should do that I sometimes don't accomplish anything!!!--its a tangled web that I have weaved.

It's funny because I think I put on a pretty good front. I think people assume that I have it all together. My house is usually straightened up when people come over and I am able to do a lot of work for my church because I have the extra time to devote to it! But, this is sooooo not the case. I soooo don't have it together. In fact, it is rather the opposite. I'm usually a second away from going utterly crazy.

Behind the scenes I am frustrated, overwhelmed, and I feel insignificant at times because I'm just a stay-at-home wife. I mean seriously, what do I do that is so important?!

Well, I will tell you what. I'm determined to change this mindset that I have. As a woman, don't we always seem to have such a self-defeating attitude?? Why can't we ever be good enough for ourselves, when we are such a blessing to those around us?! If aren't stay-at-home moms, we want to be. If we don't have a career, we want to have one. If we don't...then we want....

Being a stay-at-home wife isn't really what I had in mind when I started college almost six years ago. I originally started off going for international business. I had high hopes and dreams of taking my family's local business and turning it into a national real estate investment and developing firm! I had huge dreams and knew that someday I would be traveling all over the world via my own private jet.

Well, that is not what God had planned for me.

Little did I know that I would do so bad in accounting (i.e. have NO interest in it) that I would end up changing my major because of it. Sure I got the basic gist of things and I still feel like I could have passed that class if I tried harder, but I really believe that I wasn't meant to go into business. So, I graduated from Messiah with a degree in Human Development and Family Science. This degree was nicknamed the "M-R-S" degree. Yea...I'm the poster child. Nice to meet you.

Life really hasn't turned out exactly as I thought it would six years ago (echm who's does?!). But I'm learning to be ok with it. God has a plan for me. I don't know what it is. But really, yet again, who does? I just hope that mine involves a quiver full of kids ;)

Yup, that one if for you Jonathan! Love you!

All of that to say, I read this post today and it made me realize a few things.

1.) I really need to get my butt into gear--there is so much more that I could and should be doing.

2.) I need to be realistic about what my day to day routine looks like.

The type A personality that consumes me, craves for organization in every area of my life. So, that is what I'm aiming to achieve over the next few months. It is time that I work towards something.

That is why I signed up for a half marathon.

 That is why I am taking my extra time and putting together a slue of healthy-go-to recipes--so I have no excuse to eat poorly.

That is why I am going to kick this whole boarder-line-diabetes and overweight thing in the butt.

That is why I am going to organize our things down to the items that I really do need and not the items that seem to be filling up empty space for no reason.

That is why I am going to work on my poor excuse for a spiritual life.

I believe that God wants our lives to be pretty, but more importantly I think He wants them to be practical and not filled with frivolous clutter. So, my intention is to focus more on Him and rid my life of the things that take away from that focus. I don't want to be perfect, I just want to be intentional.

I am a stay-at-home wife. I don't have children, nor a job, which takes up most of my day. So, I'm going to learn to enjoy this place in my life while I can. I'm going to work on enjoying this place even though I want so badly to be in another. God has a plan. I just need to learn to be patient and learn to enjoy this crazy ride!